sadness

I am not done re doing my blog, but just wanted to say a few words about sadness.

 Sadness because someone I thought was a good friend took something wrong I posted on FB and I feel like I hurt her and my heart is broken again.
Sadness because I finally got to the blog from a pastor-though i did not agee with him in alot of doctrine did some wonderful things to help me when I was in the depths of a horrible tribulation. he paid for me to be with my family when at first we had not the means to move my stuff and I had to stay behind and pack. he lost a battle with cancer this year. he was just 59.
Sadness because my middle son was amrried a mere year and a half ago and his wife has left as she wanders aimlessly on the dark side.

Sadness because my oldest boy who won every reward for Bible memorization and played his trumpet so proudly in front of a church of #1000 for God.. Has laid that trumpet aside and my dreams fro him are so crushed since he does not follow God totally.
Sadness for all those in pain whose love ones have disappeared without a trace. the unknown or living with the torment when many times found and knowing what was done to them before they died.
Sadness for so many wandering in the darkness of sin, not wanting or realizing where they are headed at death-the cure.
Sadness with the clinical depression that engulfs me off and on, even knowing that God uses it. Still it is so difficult to see a silver lining.
Sadness for parting friends and loved one across miles or in death.
Sadness for the unexplainable, the faithful pet who brought such joy lying in the road, or the sound of the siren of an ambulance in the night.
LOSS, SUFFERING, PAIN,  BETRAYAL, REJECTION, HORROR. Any name it comes by.............

As I rejoice waiting for HEAVEN.